The elephant in the room


That monkey’s uncle in the cat’s pyjamas is a queer bird

a wolf in sheep’s clothing, dogging your footsteps while you rabbit on

worming his way into your confidence with a horse laugh

then ratting on you, parrotting your secrets with a sheepish grin. What a skunk

what a pig what a louse what a weasel what a toad what a snake

what a creepy-crawly! That dog in the manger has let the cat out of the bag

and sold you a whale of a pup. It’s a dog’s dinner.

It’s the straw that broke the bee’s knees. How can you bear it?

What a goose you are to let him badger you

what a lamb to the slaughter, what a sloth, what a stupid cow.

You can lead a horse to a hot tin roof

but you can’t make it act the goat. Give him the bird!



4 thoughts on “The elephant in the room

  1. Wish I could swan about composing such thought-provokers, just makes me crabby to know the cat has got my tongue where witty responses are concerned. Sick as a parrot I might just go and get rat-arsed, and follow it with the hair of the dog.

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